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Category Archives: Life/Living
Grateful for Today
Your body may be tired, but do what allows your soul rest with no doubt or question. Give fear, anxiety and hate no place, no room to live in your life. Allow love, consideration and respect to take root. Let your faith help it grow so that nothing that may come against your tired body can prosper. Never give up. Keep moving forward. I’m thankful for this day.
Your Success Is On The Way
Have sustainable success by having a mentality that is sustainable for success. You remember the names of winners and soon forget those they defeated. Success is obtainable, but is not always sustainable. People who sustain success seem to gravitate towards those who possess or indicate a similar mentality sustainable for success. You’ve learned how best to utilize your time by not arguing with people. You try to help, contribute, educate or lend support to them, but only if they show that they’re receptive.
The reasons being is that you’ve found your joy, your peace, what works for you and you’re not trying to have anyone get you off course. You choose to walk by faith, but they decide to walk by sight. Seeing is believing might be true, but it all depends on your vision and what steps you’ve taken in that purpose. So if you have a dream, live it. Stop talking and listening to people who rather stay asleep; your success depends on it.
Sustainable success requires a renewed mentality, a focused vision and self-control. This means you let no one, not your parents, siblings, spouse, children, other family members, friends, neighbors, coworkers, classmates, your circumstances, upbringing, your finances, education, social perceptions, race, gender, spiritual beliefs, age, disability, what your are, where you live or even your past failures and mistakes get in your way of your success.
See… Sigh… I’m really not trying to preach, but this is something I’ve become passionate about. I know how it feels not to be believed, considered, accepted or trusted for little to no reason at all and still the outcomes proves you were right. I would love to share my story with you, but I’ve been burned too many times to freely share it anymore and with anyone.
Everyone, not matter how close they are to you or how much alike they are to your experiences or even how nice they are will understand what has made you who you are. I want you to understand that there’s a plan for success in your life, but it’s up to you to receive it, apply it and maintain it. Trust me I know the fear, it was an unwanted guest in my life for far too long. It was when I realize that fear was what was robbing me blind of my joy that I kicked it out. I just want my neighbors to know that it’s in the neighborhood and to not be deceived.
Success is in your future. Don’t let it be disrupted by anything or anyone reminding you of your past or suggesting that your present circumstances will never pass. You will succeed and I will cheer you along the way. We can laugh about the stumbles, trips and falls along our way. The point is not to quit. Success is waiting.
Success has pathology and Failure has pathology. Your steps have been ordered for success, but it’s up to you to get up and go towards it. Stop listening to those who don’t care about you. Find your path and start walking. Don’t Give Up. Keep Moving Forward. We’re going to make it. Let’s go.
Dream Again
What should you do when your dreams are deferred and/or does not come true? Dream Again.
Stop giving up so easily because it didn’t work the first, second or fifty-seventh time. Get up, because there’s nothing to be ashamed of for putting forth an effort. Your failures teaches you what didn’t work, failed people use your failures to encourage you to stop trying, no matter how persuasive or subtle they may be.
“Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world.“
- Harriet Tubman
It may be all a dream. You may be only looking at the success of those in the magazines, but whether your dream is to become an Academy Award Actress, a Supermodel, a Congressman, Business Owner or even a dream to just teach the world what makes for peace. Forget your naysayers, the doubt peddlers and cynics. They’re living out their dream as being the killer of yours. What you got to do is to not allow them to slow you down or blur your vision; press towards the mark.
In the sermon, “Unfulfilled Dreams”, Dr Martin Luther. King spoke of Gandhi’s desire to unite India but Gandhi died with the country split. In the same message he spoke of David’s dream of building the temple, but David died before the work was complete. If you consider the enduring works of Medgar Evers, Malcolm X and Dr. King, each assassinated before their dreams were anything close to be realized.
When you share your dreams, desires, hopes and aspirations with others, understand not everyone has the eyes to see it and others has nothing in them to even feel it.
Observe the language and attitudes of people that you called friends, family members, certain Supreme Court Justices, political parties, religious groups and their opposition and you wonder like Langstan Hughes with the question that asks, “What happens to a dream deferred?”
“The horizon leans forward, offering you space to place new steps of change.”
- Maya Angelou
You have what it takes. Your dream may not be my dream, but a dreamer recognizes a dreamer and dreams with them.
So I encourage you to go get it. Keep dreaming the dreams. Dreams only become reality when you have the mind and courage to dream it. I know it is difficult and frustrating, but don’t give up.
Dream Again. If you don’t mind, I’ll dream with you.
Put Your Foot In It
The water parts when you put your foot in it. Until then the waters of your life’s Jordan River will continue to rage before you. When you have the faith, some may say courage to take the first step towards your destiny, the water parts before you. If there’s something you feel called to do, do it, but put your foot in it.
When There’s Nothing Left To Say
Everyone is not going to understand or even respect your story. You can not allow that to affect your story. Someone will always have something to say in doubt about you, what you believe, your motives and what you’re trying to do or the way you live. Remember that it’s not about what they say or do, but what you say and do.
We all encounter those who doubt or misunderstand your intentions. They may call you names or just mock your purpose. You may hear them out, but how do you/they respond in those times when there’s nothing left to say?
When the burden is such that you just sigh and keep moving.
Our society has become so uptight that you’re afraid to just hold the hand or hug someone whose going through the same or equally difficult time as you because you don’t want the gesture to be misinterpreted. My way around this has been to find another way to achieve the same goal of a hug, touch or holding of a hand; so I write. I try to write in a way that whosoever reads it may feel the same warmth in it as a hug or holding of a hand offers.
We all experience and endure our fair share of difficulties, some last longer or are harder than others. You may have family and friends who try to help you, but it isn’t as transformative as that private conversation, impromptu hug at the right time, the touch of a warm hand embrace or a simple walk in the park or even a jog around the block. Sometimes this is the only way you can say thank you, I’m here for you or even show your love when there’s nothing left to say.
Whatever you may have lost, losing, suffering from or going through, you can endure it. Faith isn’t a religious preference, but a lifestyle. Trouble doesn’t last always, so keep moving forward beyond these impeding mountains of despair, heartbreak, stress, illness, injury and trouble.
I don’t always know exactly what to say, but know that you’re loved.
Making a Productive Life
Illustration By: how-bout-a-hug
In order to have a more productive life we must begin by stop finding and start making.
What I mean by that is that we often put what we can do today off on tomorrow without consideration. Consider how much time we spend searching, finding and getting ready to, than we do utilizing that time making, creating and doing.
We’ve all made similar excuses for why we can not, did not, do not or will not complete something. If I can just find the time to… or there’s just isn’t room in my life for that now. My favorite is, I’m only one person, and I can’t do everything. That’s true, but what can you do?
Your life and time are irreplaceable, so live it wisely.
Begin by considering what you do not know.
Do what makes for peace.
Do what makes it right.
Justify your words with actions.
Stop condemning the lives of others and live a life that goes about uplifting others who are frequently put down.
What is the harm in telling someone you love them when your motives or intentions are sincere?
Learn to see the beauty in others more than showing them how ugly you can be.
I realize not everyone has a mind or heart open enough to make for peace or unity. Many people are unsympathetic and have become conditioned in a way that hate, fear and animosity is comfortable or acceptable. Asking or even expecting them to demonstrate love towards one another with compassion and humbleness is nonsense, foolish and incomprehensionable. How do you do what makes for peace with unpeaceful people?
When you encounter such an individual(s) who only knows how to respond with insult, inconsideration and disapproval, let your response teach them a lesson; a lesson of love, a lesson of consideration, a lesson of kindness. Consider what you both do not understand.
Don’t worry about how you can get them back or prove them wrong, because that’s not important. What’s important is the opportunity you have to give.
What can be learned that makes for something good, instead of leaving us searching and finding the words we should have said afterwards?
Stop finding and start making.
Give an answer to hate by responding with love. The ultimate reaction to hate is the action of love. This is making for peace.
Address fear, anxiety and trepidation with words of confidence, consideration and courage. Stop finding the words to say or what to do and uplift those who are down. This is making for peace.
Although some may ask you for the reason(s) you have hope, joy or peace, your answer may be foreign to them, but gentleness is always understood.
We all have complained about the world today. Many have asked what was wrong with people. Some are trying to find solutions, alternatives and means for escape or avoidance. I’m asking you to stop finding and start making. Begin each day by doing what makes for peace.
Looking Your Best
Photographer: Reina Lopez
Listen, you never know who’s looking at you, so do all that you can to look your best. This doesn’t mean you are the sharpest dressed or the prettiest, it means that you have the or one of the sharpest minds of anyone they know. It means you have the or one of the beautifulest spirits of anyone they know.
You may not have the money, opportunities or consideration and access as those who may or have looked down upon you have, but you have within you what you need to be greater than their imagination and opinions of you. Consider who you are and make sure you are looking your best.
Let me stop, but I do have something to say that as each day, week and month progress it is like a fire that is becoming hard to contain and finding that I’ve got to say it even if you think I’m crazy or foolish for saying it. More and more I simply do not care if someone disagrees, it needs to be said in hopes it comes into agreement with someone with a mind and heart open enough to receive it. So say whatcha want, either way it goes you’re still looking at me in order to even know what I’ve said.
Sigh… But my name is Tim, not Jeremiah (some of you get that reference, but if not, don’t worry about). I just felt this in my heart to say to those who are facing their oppositions of today with any measure of uncertainty to Look Up, because you never know whose looking at you. Don’t be surprised by the opposition you may be receiving, they’re just letting you know they’re looking at you. So look your best.
And that’s all I need to say today.
There’s nothing wrong with you.
An Elephant, A Wise Man and Six Blind Men
An Elephant, A Wise Man and Six Blind Men
Once upon a time, there lived six blind men in a village. One day the villagers told them, “Hey, there is an elephant in the village today.” They had no idea what an elephant is. They decided, “Even though we would not be able to see it, let us go and feel it anyway”, so all of them went where the elephant was.
Finally they’ve arrived. Each of them went to touch the elephant.
The first blind man touched the elephant’s leg and said, “Hey, the elephant is a pillar.”
The second blind man touched the elephant’s tail and said, “Oh, no! It is like a rope.”
The third blind man touched the elephant’s trunk and said, “Oh, no! It is like a thick branch of a tree.”
The fourth blind man touched the elephant’s ear and said, “No, it’s like a big hand fan.”
The fifth blind man touched the elephant’s belly and said, “It is like a huge wall.”
Then the sixth blind man touched the elephant’s tusk and said, “It is like a solid pipe.”
Hearing how the other men described the elephant, they disagreed and began to argue about the elephant. In true fashion, each of them insisted that he was right.
As the debate continued, it began to look like they were getting agitated. Their fellow villagers began to position themselves for what appeared to be a fight. Wagers were privately made amongst the onlookers for who they believe would win and right.
The situation looked grim until a wise man passing by saw the commotion and stopped to ask the six men, “What is the matter?”
One of the blind men exclaimed, “We cannot agree to what the elephant is like.” Not to be overlooked, each blind man told the wise man what he thought the elephant was like.
Calmly, the wise man responded by saying each of them were right, then explained why.
The reason why you all are correct is that each of you are sharing what you feel, but from a different perspective. Each one of you touched the different part of the same elephant. So, actually the elephant has all those features what you all said, but that isn’t the whole elephant.
We could continue observing this exchange, but the moral of the story is that there may be some truth to what someone says. Demonstrate consideration.
Sometimes we can see that truth and sometimes not because they may have a different perspective, experiences, comprehension, level of interaction or bias which we may not agree too or understand. So, rather than arguing like the blind men, we should say, “Maybe you have your reasons.” This way we don’t get in unnecessary, unproductive and endless arguments.
The theory of manifold predictions teaches tolerance towards others for their viewpoints. It is a path towards peace that leads you into a place of harmony with the people of different thinking.
This is also found within various religious practices as well, but the very mentioning of religion has the ability to turns some into blind men.
It can be found in our politics, but the mentioning of politics has the ability to blind men as well.
We can utilize it in conversations regarding race, but the slightest mentioning of race in any situation has blinded many men.
For some, the mentioning of sex blinds them. One can only assume that the glare that shines from how one finds love proves to be too bright.
You may find that the mentioning of money, finances, investments, taxes, tithing or economics turns some into blind men.
An optometrist couldn’t help those who suffer from blindness at the utterance of abortion.
Finally, there are those that the suggestion of forgiveness, consideration or tolerance blinds them.
Perhaps they can not see how not practicing sincere consideration can eventually hurt them more than it hurts or opposes others.
Whatever it may be for you, what isn’t expressed is why the one with sight was considered to be wise? Could it be the way he approached the situation?
When you look at our society today and observe what is being said, considered and practiced, you wonder why and how so many people believe what they see on television, hear on the radio or read in various publications as if that is the only choice or correct perspective. They typically will not consider another point of view unless it comes from someone who considers them in some way.
Consider your approach.
The wise man could have laughed at the blind men and called them foolish. He could have said to his friends that these people are crazy. He could have just shook his head and kept walking and accepted the attitude that whispers to your conscious, “It’s not my problem.”
Perhaps the wise man could have even observed the blind men and corrected each of them where they were wrong, raised question of the validity of each of their claims, then dismissed them for being a bunch of blind kooks. Instead he decided to solve the problem instead of enhance it.
Consider what you can do when you encounter the blind that gathers around the elephant. How can you help? Perhaps you may realize that they’re not the only blind ones, but you’ll never know what you all can see together when you close your eyes to consideration.
Life’s most persistent question asks; what are you doing for others?
Never Give Up
It seems like whenever I take a moment to walk everyday, I always come back with something to say. It doesn’t matter what type of day I’m having. It seems such a thought comes to mind and the need to share it. So I would like to offer this one to those of you who may have those times as I sometimes do where I simply ask myself, “What’s the use?” and want to just give up and be mediocre.
Don’t give up.
We make mistakes. We say things we shouldn’t. We think things that we sometimes learn to regret, but don’t let that stop you from being what you can be. Do not give up.
Never give up, because “To be a star, you must shine your own light, follow your own path, and don’t worry about the darkness, for that is when the stars shine brightest”, never give up.
If you’re dealing with an illness or injury, don’t give up. You can make it and/or make the best of it. Don’t lose hope.
Take from the words of the historian, Charles Austin Beard when he said, “When it is dark enough, you can see the stars.” It may seem that you are at your lowest point, but understand that if it is true, then the only direction you have left to go is up. You absolutely can do this.
We simply must not lend space to fear.
When the dream killers in your life stalk you with their words of doubt, cynicism, grief, negativity, fear, hate and hopelessness, you look at how far you’ve come and consider all that you’ve been through and know that you can and will make it. You’ll make it as long as you do not listen to their negative reports of what you can’t do and do what you know you can do and make a mockery out of their doubts of you and your abilities. Understand that you can make it as long as you never give up.
I know who I may sound like, but it is our responsibility to keep hope alive. Hope is alive in us. But we must not just sit around hoping things get better, get up and do something to make it better. Change your thinking. Change your language. Change your attitudes. Admit your mistakes and what you need to work on, but don’t allow that to limit how far you are willing to go.
So much I can say, but to sum it up in three words; Never Give Up.
I Never Knew Silence Could Be So Loud
Personally, I’ve given up trying to have meaningful conversations with any individual who can not demonstrate consideration, because it is unproductive. I’ve honestly tried and have observed the behavior, language and perceptions many exhibit towards others and issues or situations. How can you teach anyone who is not willing to first be a student?
This is the reason why I haven’t posted many political post, because I am expecting sincerity, consideration and some version of an intellectual conversation, regardless of the topic of the post. Some simply want to comment on politics only in a way that demonstrates an inconsideration or to be argumentative. I simply do not have the time or energy for those types of conversations. Their silence is louder than they realize.
Someone shared a link with me, which is the video featured of an issue that I’ve tried to get people to understand for awhile. I’ve decided to let people who want to be left behind, be left behind. I’m moving forward.
After listening to the brief story of Susan Grigsby’s brother (Steve); who died a painful death fighting for care as an uninsured American. Susan watched, horrified, as the GOP Presidential Candidates on CNN’s Tea Party Debate stood silent when the the audience cheered for the idea that we as a society should just let an uninsured man die. Now Susan wants an answer from each and every GOP candidate.
I honestly wish Susan luck, because I do not believe that she may get a real answer to her questions. But I’m sure she’ll receive plenty of rhetoric, denials, doubt, accusations, indirect responses, avoidance and inconsideration. Listen to what is said, but also listen closer to what they do not or will not say. That’s where you find their truth.
Some will choose their method of attack and avoidance to go after me or even the issue, but the question remains. I simply give up on expecting anything else, but Susan Grigsby is the one asking the question this time. I’m only providing a venue for her to share it.
Forgiveness: A Renewable Spirit Initiative
Forgiveness is a natural resource whose power is not being effectively utilized in our world today.
We can not continue running our lives on the cheap fuel of selfishness, discontent and hatred. It’s unsustainable. Forgiveness is eco-friendly and good for your emotional environment when properly used with consideration.
People can and do change. It may be a situation, circumstance, attitudes, stigma, condition or responsibility that changes us. You are the example of that truth. Let that change be one that moves you forward instead of backwards or no where.
Forgiveness is a gift that we should not begrudgingly give. It’s a natural resource that we have an abundance of, but rarely utilize. The energy we spend hating, disapproving, dismissing, discouraging and avoiding others could best be utilized into a renewable energy that may take us further in life. That is only if we choose to use it.
Be open to asking for forgiveness. Be willing to give it. You have nothing to lose and so much to gain from it. Everyone can offer you reasons they should be forgiven, but few are willing to forgive others.
The Imagination of People in Desperate Times
What would it be like to live in a place where we were not bound by what we thought was impossible?
A place where we did not have to guard our thoughts, a place where we were guided by our ideas and directed by our suggestions? A place where the imagination isn’t bound by our fear of rejection or conflict?
We are so bound by the limitations of our own mind. Our biggest obstacle of our life’s work is that we fail to involve our imagination. Our thoughts, ideas and suggestions often become what we have heard, seen or been told. We are so willing to limit ourselves to a position or ideology that we loose sight of the humanity of our opposition. We only see an enemy instead of a potential friend or ally. We often find area for disagreement, that we allow little room for consideration and no space for common ground.
Many of us put ourselves in a box, but we believe we think outside the box. How is that possible, when you can’t see how one man can have the audacity of hope? (No pun intended) The testicular fortitude to believe he can change the world, not by the might of his army, but the will of his people.
To go on a slightly political and patriotic tangent for a brief moment, I have this to say to anyone willing to receive it. It’s going to get better. We defeat ourselves when we give up hope. It’s not just you; it’s not just where you live, its many people.
Some choose to blame someone, but it’s not the fault of any one person, company or political party, but the greed and lack of vision of some people, companies and political entities. I’ve found it more productive to end my distain for certain individuals and leave them to their own vices. I can only move forward and stop allowing them to hold me back with their thoughts of terror, inconsiderate ideas and suspect suggestions. We got to save the arguments for another day and time, because we all have to fix what’s messed up.
If you have to fight why not fight against the feeling of hopelessness and those who are beaten down with cynicism and pessimism due to the current situations in their lives. I can’t make you draw upon your own imagination, but I just ask you not to give up.
Perhaps I’m just a student of hope and optimism, but I believe “the hope of a secure and livable world lies with disciplined non-conformists who are dedicated to justice, peace and brotherhood.” – Martin Luther King, Jr., Strength to Love (1963)
How powerful are the words you think, say and believe? Do you believe what you say or do you just say what you believe? I know everything seems bleak in every way, but keep moving, don’t give up. Don’t be bound by the limitations of our own mind and lack of imagination. Don’t get caught up in the places of complacency and hopelessness. Keep moving.
References & Inspirations Jewish Journal – 01/20/08 – “Keep Moving from This Mountain (1965) – MP3 pt.1 & MP3 pt.2” Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. – 1963 “Strength to Love”Silencing the Critics
How to silence the critics?
Offer them ways and request their suggestions for ways we can work together to solve the problem. Your critic is interested in criticizing more than they are in contributing something constructive. Their criticisms may be fueled by an implicit bias, unconscious act of discrimination or contempt or a propensity to respond with an adversarial tone. But the path to peace begins with communication.
Simply speak with sincerity to the problem, but ask, illustrate and/or suggest ways we can work to solve the issue, beginning with consideration for the problem above the individual. The person who is a critics will have little or nothing to say, the person who may have criticisms will respond back with sincerity.
Some people only want to be heard or seen. They need your argument to validate their misconceptions, bias, misunderstanding or point-of-view. They may be right, but usually someone who is right offers their criticisms uncritically, but considerately. It’s difficult to criticism consideration and unity without revealing your true intentions and motivations.
Remember that you don’t have to be wrong for me to be right.
What Happened?
What Happened?
By: Tim Valentine
Have you ever been walking down the street and had a homeless person ask you for some money and you acted like you didn’t hear them?
Have you ever been in your car and sitting at a light and rolled your windows up?
Have you ever given someone who was homeless money and privately questioned what they’re going to do with the little bit of money you gave them?
How often have you seen someone homeless and in addition to offering them some money you also gave them a compliment or a kind word?
Anyone can be the face of homelessness. The difference between you and that person living on the street is the circumstances of your story.
The question we choose not to ask someone who is homeless is What Happened?
Often it is because many choose not to care or ask or show any concern. We’re just happy that it isn’t us, right?
We spend so much time fighting to be seen more than we do concerning ourselves who just seek acknowledgment. Dare they question your sincerity, who are they to you, but an annoyance. This is the attitude many people implicitly accept when confronted with the ugliness of homelessness. We mistakenly transpose the ugliness of the situation onto the beauty of the individual captured within that situation.
Who is concerned enough to ask, what happened?
Some simply just don’t care. They’ll tell them to get a job, but never stop to think what address they will put on the application so the employer can send them their check, then what about taxes. If you have a job you’re required to pay your taxes. Where will the employer send their W2? Get a job is another way of saying, I’m not helping you, not go away. If you’re not able to offer them a job, then don’t say “Get a job.” Think, if they had a job, would they be homeless?
Have enough consideration to not step over, around or away from someone homeless, but help them up. Help them up with an encouraging word that means something to them. You can’t say, “hand in there” and expect that to go over well with them, when life has its boot on their neck.
If you have the time, ask them how can you help them?
If you have no money, food or shelter to offer, you can always listen. Sometimes a sincere handshake, tender smile or concerned word last longer than any amount of money, clothing or food you have to give.
I say this from the heart. I’ve been very fortunate to have never experience homelessness. But all it takes is a change in circumstances and I may be the one you step over and ignore.
Consider what can happened.
