*This is what I like to call a structured or themed random thought. This is just my thoughts on a bigger subject that I’ve wanted to speak about for awhile. This is a peak at something bigger that I’ve always wanted to write about, but never got around to it. What you see here begins to touch on a few of the sub-topics.”
I want all who reads this to understand that my intent is not to criticize, denigrate or minimize the importance of manhood. I as a man love myself, so why would I come against myself? I can be critical in my critique of myself in order to identify what I can improve upon or where I have improved.
Obviously I do not have the answers to what essentially is manhood. I’m still learning myself. I only am writing from my own understanding and experiences. What I’ve written is only what I strive to accomplish as a man, husband and father. Please refrain from assumptions, perceptions and/or any measure of prejudice you may harbor towards men in general or any specific group of men due to the personal failures of a man.
Inspiration & Motivation
Some may find it odd that I’m writing about men during Women’s History Month, but where would women be if there were no men?
Now some women may be thinking the world would be a better place. You may be right, but think how boring and confusing it would be. Nothing would ever get done, because you would just change your mind. J OK, OK, I’m just playing. Please save the emails, I’m just joking.
Let me get serious.
My Male Influences
I’ve tried to share my thoughts, ideas and suggestions about various things in life with the occasional glimpse into my own life. Those of you who have read this blog for some time can conclude who some of the individuals who has been influential in my life.
The common denominator I realized in the men who have or continue to be influential to me is theology. Each person has either been or is a minister. This does not mean that my influences are always slanted towards the side of a particular religious belief, because all of these ministers were individuals who challenged the mainstream religious thought, just as another highly notable misunderstood spiritual figure did.
If you have read this blog for awhile you can assume some of my fondest influences. The notables are towering figures in history, theology and academic. Figures such as Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., Dr. Frederick K.C. Price, Dr. Cornell West, Dr. Michael Eric Dyson and a few others. There are others who are better known for their works in business, music and politics, but it’s not important for me to list them all; because I may mistakenly omit someone.
I must give tremendous credit to my father as the greatest influence. A minister and all around good guy he taught me things that may not be within the chapter and verse of the Bible, but its foundation was rooted within the book. He taught me by example, which is how I tend to learn quicker. Perhaps that’s why I have a bent towards some of the subjects I talk about, although my experiences may be more diverse.
All of the thoughts, ideas and suggestions mentioned here are not originally mine, but how I understand and conceptualize it.
Many children desire to make their parents happy and/or want their parents to be proud of them. Not all parents take the time to nurture and properly cultivate this desire. We’re just too busy doing other things to pay the attention to our children that they deserve. I understand, because I have bills to pay, services to provide and chores to complete. I barely have time to watch my favorite television shows, listen to what I want to listen to or even take an uninterrupted nap. So I do understand.
Not all children are fortunate enough to have a father who makes an effort to be a consistent positive influence in their life. I have tremendous respect for the mothers, family members and friends who fulfill that role for someone.
You Da Man
Many men often may not understand the magnitude of the role they play as a man or as a husband and/or as a father. What I have concluded in my experiences is that being a man, husband and a father means you can never give up. It’s all on you and you will be the one that must accept the responsibility. You’re the man.
This goes beyond race, education, economics, class, political ideology and even religious practices. Although the role of man has spiritual foundations and associations the way a man conducts him is relevant regardless of whom you are.
When we think about who we are today and why we do certain things look at where a man has had apart in your development. We often hear women say, “I don’t trust men”, “All men are dogs” or “My father or brother, uncle or some man did _______”. We as men must understand that many of the problems we are faced with today stems from our involvement whether that involvement was intentional or none at all. Mothers and women can’t do it all. They will do it all, but they should not do it all and frankly are not supposed to do it all.