In many relationships comes a time where you find yourself questioning your commitment to it. It may be a friendship, dating, marriage, professional/business and/or even spiritual. You just get tired of certain things that the other person may do or not do, say or not say, use to do or have stopped doing. The thought of divorce, separation or distancing yourself is now an idea or even being suggested.
Some may not publicly admit it, but privately you know it’s true. There is no perfect relationship. Our relationship is a commitment to an imperfect person for our ideal situations. What you tend to not consider is that we are the imperfect one in the relationship. Forever afraid of being the one in the wrong, determine to win any argument at any cost and seek sympathy for our victimization by the other person.
Marriage is often the prime example of a commitment. We go into it wide eyed, but for some reason can’t see the issues that the other has stored away and others see because we’re in love. What I’ve found entertaining is watching how long that vision lasts. I’m not hoping or believing in divorce or difficulties for the couple, but I know it’s going to occur. The measure of your commitment is how you respond when times get hard. Those reading this that has been in a relationship for an extended period of time may be able to testify to the validity of that statement.
If I am to be honest in what I write I am willing to admit that my relationships have not always been as I originally thought or think it should be. I’m fortunate to say that none were abusive or dysfunctional, but selfishness can be found within all parties. It is when one person is aware, honest and willing enough to remember their commitment to find peace.
Don’t make a habit of dwelling on the bad times more than the good times. Remind yourself why the person loves, likes or works with you and the benefit of you loving, liking or working with them. We must stop trying to rewrite our history and focus on making history. Be the first people you know to reconcile a marriage gone sour and come back stronger than before. Be the one to forgive your parent(s) for the things they didn’t know how to do or for repeating the mistakes that was done to them over with you. Think of the person you call friend enough to see how he/she is doing after a disagreement. Go visit that person you haven’t talked to for awhile that is not doing to well today. It’s not about what was done, but what you do now.
So as I attempt to conclude this thought for this moment I want to just ask you to consider others and remember your commitment to each other. Take time to communicate with the one you are committed to. Whether that commitment is professional, personal, emotional or spiritual, give it time. Give it time doesn’t mean you wait to see what happens, it means you give your time, energy and commitment to it.
Finally, be willing to admit that you’re wrong. Yeah I thought she was pretty, I liked the way he looked at me or I felt abandoned or betrayed so I did things I shouldn’t have. Be the one to admit it and do something positive about it. In every situation everyone is not going to understand or respond in the best manner. Some relationships may end or can only be resolved with divorce, separation or distance. Just don’t allow that to govern your next relationship. Remember your commitment.